14 minutes

I've had a major dilemma

The first time I went to a solarium was 3 weeks ago. The nice girl convinced me not to go in for too long, so I stood there for 8 minutes in the big cylindrical solarium machine wondering if the damn thing was on and feeling like a fool. I hopped out at the end of it and asked her if it was supposed to light up or anything, cos although I'd never been to one in my life, the ones I'd usually seen in pictures glowed blue. She assured me that these machines didn't really light up much.

I trusted her. That was my first mistake.

So on Saturday I go back - to the same solarium - for the second solarium visit in my life. Seeing as I'd seen no visible effects from my previous 8 minute visit, I just asked what the longest I could stay in was, and booked a 14min slot. So I hit the button and climb into the machine and it's lit up all blue. Last time it didn't light up blue.

so I knew it definitely hadn't turned on properly that first time. I'd stood there for 8 minutes in a tiny little cylinder and achieved nothing. how embarrassment.

so I just stayed there for the 14min, and when I hopped out I explained to the girl how it definitely didn't work last time, and she apologised and credited my account with the 8min

if the damn machine had worked when I was in there for 8 min the first time, I would've got a little burnt and realised 8min was fine, if not a little too much. Instead, I had logically assumed it wasn't enough and knowing nothing about solariums, went the full amount. I went in at 4pm Saturday, but about 8pm I was glowing red. All over. fried. Yesterday I didn't even leave the house. I look ridiculous. Today I am working from home.

Not to mention the pain. I have sunburnt underarms. I have almost certainly done permanent damage to my skin

The sucky thing is, it's not really my fault cos I knew nothing about solariums and had no way of knowing this would happen. It's not totally the girl's fault that the machine didn't work the first time - though she should've not been so casual about saying the tubes didn't light up much - there's a very distinct blue glow... and she sure as hell should've stopped me booking 14min. I rang them yesterday but she wasn't working.

bring on my next skin cancer :(

My flatmates have done a tremendous job of not laughing at me every time they see me. When I woke up this morning I had to take several deep breaths before braving a look in the mirror - I think I am past the worst of it, but I'm still very much the incredible red woman. Just call me Radioactive Girl. I had to explain to the boy last night that no, I couldn't come out and meet him and his friends at the pub as planned because I was stupidly burnt and unable to put proper clothing on, let alone face a shocked and bemused public.

My inner toyboy is mortified. I have always always hated solariums because back when I was your typically bronzed Aussie, I would get accused of using them all the time and smugly reply that no, I'd never gone to one in my life. Now when I finally face up to the office my skin will be a completely different colour (hopefully tan) and I may have to admit my girly indulgence to everyone.

dammit!

An Interesting Two Months

been a while since I last posted some mundane gossip from my extra-ordinary little life.

I'd like to pretend that my fan base has been hounding me for updates - but I haven't given my Mum the address of this blog, so for the time begin my fan base remains... well... non existent.

but that hasn't stopped me crapping on before and it ain't gonna stop me now!

So to follow on from my last post, me and the adorable-balding-workmate have become fast friends - hanging out at lunch with our normal crew but often falling into cosy funny conversation, and exchanging stupid banter via email whenever bored. He and the other boys were invited out to school disco with me and the girls, and he managed to fit in a few other parties that night and turn up late. We'd had cocktails at mine beforehand so I was massively high-on-my-own-supply by the time I got there. Drunkety drunk drunk. For me the whole night passed in a whirl of dancing, giggles, and posing for photos that I was later mortified to discover on my camera. According to a couple of girls, adorable-balding-workmate never left my side. We were dancing together and someone thought they saw us kiss. Cue darling-friend-and-flatmate hurtling over my way and all but crash-tackling me to the floor. I was dragged away on the none-to-subtle pretense of "I reeeally need to talk to you". I remember that bit. She then asked if we kissed and I assured her we hadn't and continued merrily twirling my way round the dance floor. Sometime later on in the night he did try to kiss me... or something to that effect, I've forgotten the detail, but I remember telling him we had to step outside and have a talk. So I told him I didn't screw the crew, he was a mate, and it just wasn't right. He accused me of leading him on.

[short note - I have a strange, unjustified, pathological fear of ever doing this to any bloke so it was odd to be accused of it.]

I told him I'd suspected he fancied me, and I was flattered cos I thought he was great, but all I had was a suspicion, hardly enough to go and talk to him about it. I asked what I should've done - really, was my only alternative to not be his friend?

and... oddest thing of all... I had a teary. I am not usually an emotional drunk. Aggressive - yes, tearful, no. I guess he got lucky in that respect.

At least it made him feel bad - which he deserved after wrongly accusing me of leading him on. And I jumped in a black cab and that was the end of the night. Come Monday morning there was an email from him with just one word

"friends?"

I replied "of course" and things have been cool ever since. phew.

one other big thing though... whilst explaining why I couldn't date him, was also the fact that - set your faces to stun - I have being seeing someone. Yup, the same boy. regularly. Two months now. He's the first guy I've had 5 or more dates with in the last year... a terrible statistic to admit! He is only a month away from becoming the 3rd guy in my life to break the 3 month mark (the other two having lasted 4 and 2 years, which is also my excuse for not having dated much, although it becomes less relevant as I get older)

more on him later...